Script: Two scenes

Okay; here’s two scene that I have written. I don’t know where they go exactly; late in act one I’d assume.

Impressing at the beach

Oscar; having taken Ada to the beach tries to impress her.

Oscar

Okay; see the dingy.

Ada

The one floating in the water.

OSCAR

Yes. Pay the closest of attentions to it. No wait; look at my hand, and also look at the dingy.

Ada

I can’t do both at once.

Oscar

Okay; now, look, (he snaps his fingers calling forth lightening and thunder), yes!

Ada

You did that. With magic.

OSCAR

Aye!

ADA

There could have been people on that.

Oscar

Its a dingy; you could see it was empty. No… No top.

ADA

They could have been crouching.

OSCAR

At night; while it’s moored.

ADA

It belongs to somebody and now it’s sunk.

OsCAR

Yeah; but-

ADA

You vandal.

Ada exits and Oscar stands singing the Beethoven’s 5th, clicking his fingers in time to the music.

—

Cities of the world

Oscar cavorts around the cities of the world. Talking to people he can see and generally making a nuisance of himself.

Oscar

Ah, Hello. Good afternoon. Bonjourno! Guten targ. hallo? salut! My Lads!

VOICE

Mate. Wait, who’re you?

OSCAR

Never mind mate. Ola! Good evening, good evening, giid evening, good evening, guv? Good evening, sir.

voice

And a good evening to you too lad.

OSCAR

Hello ladies? Do any of you fancy some Abby synth? I picked it up this morning.

Voice

Keep your distance sir!

OSCAR

I’m so sorry that you are presently unavailable, ladies. Maybe tomorrow? Your breasts looked marvelous! Ha!

Voice

You; you Larakin! what the hell are you doing on my roof?

OsCAR

Genuinely sorry sir; do you happen to know where Chicago is from here?

VOICE

Across the blooming ocean. Get off my roof!

OSCAR

At twice sir. I mean; at once. See? Once again, the problem is solved thanks to kiwi ingenuity. Hello! How do you do? Isn’t it a fine evening? Oh, yes, good old kiwi ingenuity don’t you know. Do you happen to have some 8′ gauge wire there sir? I could fix this jalopy up in a half jiffy. Stop that war too. Heck, sir, I could. Hum. I could rig that entire sailing ship over there with just some wire, and a small amount of… hempen cord? My apologies sir, the shadows do grow long, and I fear that I must retire before… No, you are too kind. Please; there’s no need, I am more than capable of attending to my own withdrawal. Seriously now, don’t hold me, I can stand by my… Oh sod off! Have you met my fists? They’re called Donner and Blitzen!

He summons lightening to vanquish his enemies. He flies home to bed.